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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

My suggestion is to start a  text friendship  with someone suitable. Memes, links to articles, photo of something you saw shopping, etc. If they respond somewhat quickly and reciprocate, keep it going, being cautious not to overwhelm. Less pressure and chance of rejection than an invite, which can come later.    [/quote]

Lol. OP here and this might be why I struggle with these friendships -- I cannot do the whole text friendship thing. I mean, I text with friends but this specific dynamic you are talking about it is just not something I can do. I've had people do this with me and I admire their ability to be clever in quick off-the-cuff texts or to think of me randomly in the middle of their workday and send me a text about something I might be interested in.

I am great 1:1 or in small groups and can be a lot of fun and I know how to get to know people in person -- who to ask questions and share things about myself, etc. But I can't get the hang of text/social media friendships. I am not even on Facebook. I don't like looking at my phone throughout the day and mostly only keep it nearby in case something happens with my kid or there's an emergency with my DH. Who, by the way, I don't text a lot with. My personality just does not come through via texting and I've tried. Maybe that's the problem -- I can't communicate in the current language of friendship.[/quote]

Then you need to work on it. Texting is how most people converse nowadays. I turned an old college roommate into a bff by texting and the rare phone call. [/quote]

Then you need to ofind somebody who will talk on the phone with you or have 1-on-1 conversations with you. You need to put in the effort.

And realize that not everybody to be witty and fun all the time. I have a friend who had a really ... I guess you'd say lacking ... sense of humour. But she is SO lovely in other ways. She has empathy, she is kind, she is thoughtful. She is honest and open. I love being with her. I don't expect a witty reparte with her. But she's a favorite friend because she is who she is. You have to be you.

The current language of friendship isn't TEXTING. That is a mode of communication. You need to find your people and that is WORK. Use texting for invites, but save your conversation for the 1-on-1.[/quote]

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