Reply to Do you feel bad when your kid is not invited to birthday parties?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Curious if the moms here that are hurt when their child doesn't get invited to a birthday or playdate had social issues as a child.  Perhaps as a child you felt like you were being left out of things and had hurt feelings over stuff like that?[/quote]

I am the OP. I moved around quite a bit as a child. My dad was a grad student and then we moved for his work. I don’t think I ever felt bad. I went to a few. If someone had one and I didn’t know or was not invited, I don’t have any memories of feeling bad.

When I was older and now as an adult, I’m often the one who coordinates the friend birthday dinner so I definitely do not feel bad or left out.[/quote]

So...if you managed just fine through childhood and adulthood feeling just fine  if you aren't included in everything, why are you now feeling bad bc your child isn't?  You clearly realize it is normal to not be invited to everything and not a personal slight.  So what gives?[/quote]

Did you read beyond the title of this thread and read OP's actual post? OP is not sad about not being invited ton one particular party, OP feels bad because she's hearing about another person receiving many invitations and noticing that her own kid hasn't received any (yet). OP is clearly self-aware and understands it is not the end of the world. OP is instead having a relatable emotional feeling about it and deciding what actions, if any, to take.

Don't you ever experience emotions despite knowing intellectually that something is not a crisis? Jeez. [/quote]

Yes I did read.  And I stand firm that feeling sad because one other person you know that goes to the same school and has received more invitations is not a justifiable cause to be sad [/quote]

The problem of course is that you don't get to decide what justifies other people's feelings. If you can't relate to OP's situation, it's okay to just not participate. But she feels how she feels and saying "no you should not feel that way get over it" will never actually solve someone's problem. I say this not because I even relate to OP specifically but because this is just a life lesson. You cannot be the arbiter of whether other people should feel the way they feel. It's not up to you.[/quote]

+1 NP[/quote]

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