Reply to What do you do when your adult child goes into therapy and lays blame at your feet.

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[quote=Anonymous]One of the challenging realizations of middle age for me is that my parents are to blame for many of my mental health issues (inherited depression, many anxiety issues and behaviors due to childhood abuse, negative relationship patterns it has taken me decades to break) but also that they did the best they could, were not aware that what they were doing at the time would cause so many issues for me, and there is little they can do now to change it.

It's just a reality you all have to learn to live with. He might be angry and resentful at times. That is his right and may be necessary to help him process these issues and work through them. It probably will make you feel bad. You can withdraw from these interactions if they are too much for you.

I have chosen not to express a lot of my realizations about this to my parents specifically because I know it would make them very upset and they do not have the resources to do much about it. But my sister struggles with this -- she wants the catharsis of telling them why she is upset, and I get that too. It's hard for everyone.[/quote]

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