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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We pay for everything when family visits, whether it's parents/siblings/cousins. And they pay for everything when we visit. I'm Asian, and I've noticed that white families are more likely to go Dutch when dining out, going to the movies, etc.[/quote]

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We are Asians too and taking care of our guests is on us and I don't mind.  However, whenever my ILs, uncles and aunts, parents visit, while leaving they will give generous cash gifts.  So frankly, it all works out and no one is taking advantage of anyone else. Asians are by nature frugal but we treat all guests with warm hospitality and generosity.  In fact, reciprocity is very ingrained in us.

I have had to dial back on my cultural norms when I deal with White people because it is an individualistic culture. Earlier, I used to  feel hurt that they take, take, take all the time but they never ever reciprocate. Later, I realized that it is just their socialization. They will either take things for free or go dutch.  So, it is up to you to get over your hesitation and politeness and be clear about who is paying for what when dealing with them. [/quote]

Asians burden their children physically, emotionally and financially with their elder care, creating suppressed resentment, under the guise of maintaining a "close knit" family.

^^^ I don't believe that but see how that works? Maybe it's better not to generalize in a way that demeans others. [/quote]

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