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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Never be around FIL. Ever. And tell everyone exactly why if they ask.

I can’t believe your husband isn’t protecting you.

If you have a child, YOU MUST PROTECT YOUR CHILD FROM FIL.[/quote]

NP. Yes. OP, your husband should cut off contact with his father over this. Do you not see that? Your. Husband. Should. Cut. ALL. Contact. With. His. Father.

No exceptions.

Does your DH know? If he does, does he make excuses for his father? "He doesn't mean it." "It's not meant to be sexual! Stop thinking it is!" "It's a joke!" "He does that with all the women, it's a love pat." And most toxic of all, "You're just overreacting; you're too sensitive; you can't take a joke" etc.

If your DH says any of those things, you need to tell him why it is not acceptable at all. Ever. The groping isn't and neither is DH's excusing his father in ANY way. I pray you do not have any children yet. [/quote]

If her husband says those things, she should realize that it is highly likely that her husband and siblings were sexually assaulted as kids. That's where phrases like this are learned.[/quote]

Then DH gets into intensive therapy for the abuse pronto. Non-negotiable. If he's saying those things, that is. I get that if he was abused, he would have learned this behavior, which is incredibly tragic, but having learned it as a result of being abused still cannot make it OK for him to use it on OP. That only perpetuates abuse in another form. [/quote]

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