Reply to Did anyone’s kid have a serious BF/GF when they went off to college?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Respectfully, I completely understand why it doesn’t thrill you but the best thing you can do is not make a big deal about it or push her on it. Sure, some high school relationships go the distance but most do not, and the best thing for it to do is run its course. If she feels like you’re pushing her to break up with him and ‘experience college,’ it may push her in the exact opposite direction. Let her figure out what she wants on her own and just be non-judgmental and supportive. I know it’s hard - my kids are young so I’m not at this stage yet but am remembering my own experience - I was still with my high school BF when we went to college (different but nearby schools) and my parents were so clear in how unsupportive they were of it that I just stopped talking to them about him/that part of my life, and ultimately stayed with him longer than I otherwise would have because I needed to feel like I knew better than they did. Which, ultimately, I did - we broke up on our own terms and I was at peace with it.

Re: your making friends question, I’d be more concerned if they were both going to the same college. As it is now, even IF they see each other most weekends she’ll have a lot of time during the week where she can’t just fall back onto grabbing lunch / walking to class / whatever with him, which is a good thing in terms of making new friends. [/quote]

This is so true.  My very well-meaning parents did not want me to continue dating my high school boyfriend while in college.  They knew there was so much more out there for me and of course, they were absolutely right.  But being a typical stubborn teen, I stuck it out far too long with my boyfriend when we should have gone our separate ways.  I think if they had been more neutral about it, I would have been able to make that decision sooner since I wouldn’t have been trying to prove something to them.  It was such a mistake trying to continue a high school relationship while in college.[/quote]

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