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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People on this forum are very weird about reimbursement for valuable work performed. I served as financial power of attorney for an elderly non-parent relative and paid myself $500 a month to manage her bills/finances, coordinate her assisted living care, file her taxes, and manage her investments. I am quite sure people would be horrified on this forum. I was ripped to shreds by these dcum folks upon suggesting that I should compensate myself for managing the disbursement of her trust to 24 beneficiaries upon her death. I am ignoring their advice. My recommendation for you is to chat with your siblings about what you think is a fair plan. I suspect if they are rational people can all agree to something, at the very least reimbursement for the parking and food.

You are a good daughter. He is lucky to have you.[/quote]

I control my 85yo mom’s finances and pay all her bills. I do her taxes, manage her investments, and coordinate with her assisted living. I have done so for 9 years. I don’t pay myself anything for this, even though it involves time and effort. I do it to take care of her because she took care of me when I was a child.[/quote]

I could say something similar. I’d add though, that the impact on my personal life and career goals will have lifelong implications.  The issue here for many isn’t loving enough, or valuing reciprocity, it’s realizing that caring for a family member, for some of us, may have serious implications for our ability to care for ourselves — whether that’s taking a hit to a budget that’s already been impacted by two years of coping with COVID and inflation, or damaging job and retirement prospects because of the impact of devoting time and emotional energy to a family member’s needs.

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