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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I delievered twins at 20 weeks and obviously they lived only a few hours, so I am truly sympathetic to your loss. I also endured non-stop and dangerous bleeding after a different delivery. So I understand a little bit what you went through. So please understand, I don't mean to be callous or dismissive. But, I am trying to understand how the abortion saved your life. It kind of sounds like the abortion endangered your life. What would have happened had the pregnancy been left to end on its own? Yes, it would have been difficult to know you were carrying a baby that would not survive, but it may very well have been a safer decision. Sometimes in life we suffer through very sad things. I have had my share. But I don't think it's accurate to say that abortion saved your life.[/quote]

I mean I’m not a doctor but all my doctors told me I would be at higher risk of placental abruption if I waited. So maybe it hastened the inevitable but at least I was already in the OR when it happened.[/quote]

What it hastened, by probabaly only a few hours, was delivery. In fact, my 20-week twins were born because of placental abruption and when that happens, so does spontaneous abortion--at 20 weeks, that means delivery of babies, non-viable babies. Trust me, I held mine. They are not a sack of cells as some people like to believe. I love that OP gets all kinds of sympathy for her choice to end the pregnancy, but mine ended without a choice and all I get is argument. I asked a thoughtful question, shared my opinion--which includes believing strongly in OP's and everyone else's right to abort their pregnancies--for any reason--but it's not good enough. Evidently, you're either with them on celebrating abortion or you're against them. Got it.[/quote]

I'm very sorry for both your losses and the OP's loss. It must have been -- and still is from the sound of it -- very hard, and not something you get over.

However, this is where my sympathy for you ends -- in that you cannot respect OP's decision, based on the medical advice of her doctors, to terminate her non-viable pregnancy before a life-threatening situation got worse.

You both suffered losses, but you did not walk in her shoes -- you were not faced with the decision she was, or given the medical advice to terminate she was given, because your placenta abrupted and that was that.

Can't you even have a little empathy for the OP and put yourself in her shoes? What if your placenta had abrupted or your waters broke and you *hadn't* gone into labor on your own? What if your fetuses (babies) had decomposed within you, putting you at risk of lethal infection -- or an infection that could have necessitated a hysterectomy such that you could never have another baby? These were all very real risks that you faced and, very luckily for you even in a tragic situation, avoided.

The OP is not "better than you" for making the terrible choice she had to make. But similarly, you are not "better than her" because you didn't even have time to face the hard choices she had so you didn't have to make any choice at all. It's not a pain Olympics, and it's also not a virtue Olympics. [/quote]

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