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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Therapy didn't change the household chores dynamic, so I... "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We constantly fight over this stuff. My husband was out of town and when he got back, did I mention how much I did? Of course not. But if he watches the kids in the morning so I can do house work, he mentions it several times throughout the day. His job is laundry - but the clean clothes sit in piles for weeks. The only thing that kind of helped is giving him a few defined jobs, and when he doesn’t do it, we have a sit down to remind him of his agreement.[/quote] Which one of you dictates that the other must do this list of tasks. Of course he’s on the defensive. Good God, if you think it’s your role to think of stuff for your spouse to do, divorce.[/quote] Yeah, all these B——-s just got off the plain after the honeymoon and handed DH a chore wheel. 🙄 Look, we all started with the expectation that everyone would just contribute to the running of the house in a reasonable manner and then gradually our husbands failed to hold up their end. I have some friends whose husbands just gradually stopped doing all the stuff they previously did, then I have other friends who are in my boat where our husbands opted in to bigger life responsibilities (home ownership, kids, etc.) but assumed that they would have the same amount of free time as when we were DINKs in a small apartment. When someone is at the point where she is ready to break up her marriage over the chores, it is not because she is too picky about the level of cleanliness.[/quote] But these women also need to be smart and know that despite everyone's best intentions, they are the true brains of getting things working at home (like they are at work). So they need to budget for outsourcing and always have a staff. Yes, pay the money towards domestic staffing and take control of the finances. Did you really expect that the males of the species will figure this out? [/quote]
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