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[quote=Anonymous]Not popular DCUM advice but honestly don't feed into her drama and your husband shouldn't either.

Your 4 year old is old enough to start learning about lying and having consequences . It's good for both your kids to know that lying on each other isn't okay.he didn't tattle he lied

Most of the time I would not get involved in the who is first stuff.

You handled the tub thing just fine and if she wanted to pout about the consequences oh well. Her choice. You have to learn not to take her pouting and tantrums personally.
You can try a quick reset such as " Larla, let's get out of the tub now and go pick some hairbands to brush your hair out" or whatever.
You may also try having them alternate who gets out first. If your son cares .If not let her go first. It also helps to set expectations like " I'm going to start draining the water, once all the water is out. Well put toys away and get dried off   . What books would you like to read tonight? " 
You can have them alternate rooms for story reading or prebed snuggle in a common area 
But when you set a boundary with her your husband needs to back you up.

You can also talk with her after the fact about what she was feeling and how things can be done differently in the future.
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