Reply to New boyfriend loves this comedy routine- red flag? Or am I overthinking?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a BF in my 40s who was so sweet, kind loving and respectful, I totally fell in love with that guy!  There were some minor red flags along the way, I had been married a long time before my divorce and he was my second BF after my divorce, I thought I knew men at my age.  I discovered that I didn't "know men" I knew one man, my ex, and was learning about other men.  Our three year relationship ended with him showing me what he was really like.  It was quite painful by then.  I did learn a lot from that relationship though.  Good luck with yours.[/quote]

NP; can you elaborate? I am in a similar situation and trying to manage next steps. If you're comfortable sharing, what was the dealbreaker(s)?[/quote]

He had his own baggage as you might imagine but I loved him so much I tolerated his ups and downs and occasional comments that gave me pause, like for instance "I'm not sure I am ready to be in a committed relationship" which of course inspired an in depth conversation and ended with him saying "i don't know why I said that, I totally love you want want to be with you."  After two years he asked me to move in to his house which I did, thinking this represented a firm commitment to the relationship from him.  I was not looking for another marriage so that wasn't an issue.  I just wanted a nice life with him.  I thought that's what he wanted.  It ended when he got involved with a woman at work who came on to him (others reported that to me later) and after a few months he told me about her and said he wanted me to move out, which I did.  Later he reversed himself and said he didn't know why he did that, blah blah blah.  I did not get back together with him, in fact cut off communication but it was quite painful.  He never stopped treating me very well, we had great sex several times a week right up until he revealed the other relationship.  So you get the idea.  I don't know if your situation has any real similarities but I posted just to show that some people who seem perfect can turn out to be highly imperfect.  I guess looking back I shouldn't have moved in and should have been more attentive to the red flags.  I might have saved myself some heartache.  Or maybe not.[/quote]

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