Reply to What consequences do you use for a 6 year old?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] Need to establish a level of respect where if you say something needs to be done then she does it. Consequences need to be immediate, 1 warning only maximum. If she’s not listening change it now because it’s not going to just get easier when she’s 16. You also need to catch her being good and focus on that rather than just focusing on everything she does wrong.[/quote]

Right, so the question is what kind of consequences do you use for this?

We’re working on catching her being good as well. [/quote]

Depends on what is important to her. I can’t tell you what your kid likes or likes to do that you can take away. I would focus more on what you want her to do. Hey Sally can you please put down the book and bring me the towels from the dryer. If she doesn’t I’d take her to show her exactly what I expected the next time and explain to her why it’s important. Then I’d probably have her help me fold them and let her go back to her toy. No yelling or being mad, teaching and praising her for helping. I’d ask her to do the same task the next day or later that evening. If she did it right away I’d praise her and ask her if she wants to help me or go back to what she is doing. If she doesn’t listen then I’d probably take or end whatever she was doing, explain why listening is important, and have her follow through with getting the laundry. Then I’d have her help me fold AND put away AND whatever she was doing that was distracting her from listening to me wouldn’t be available for the rest of the evening. I would not focus on the taking away though I’d try to thank her for helping me fold and put away laundry and how much I appreciate her help. When we were finished I’d redirect her to something else, ok this isn’t available anymore because you weren’t listening earlier but I really love how you helped me with laundry so you can do x or y.  Next time I ask I might not be so nice, because by the 3rd time she knows what the expectation is. If she puts her item down but doesn’t immediately go get the laundry I’d go with her and we’d fold and put away but she could go back to her toy. I think it’s important to teach the expectations before you expect them of her. In a month hopefully you’ve taught her how to fold towels and put them away and she’ll probably offer to help because you’re giving her 1:1 attention during this.[/quote]

Thank you. This is helpful.

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