Reply to Will it be awkward if I don't offer dinner (seeing friend on college tour)

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[quote=Anonymous]I have tricky teen DDs too.  One is in college, and I'm looking at colleges now with my junior DD.

First, OP, I think college tours can be extremely stressful for many types of kids (and exhilirating for other types).  So I get it.  The DD I'm with now is historically go-with-the-flow and easy, but wow, the last couple of days I've seen that rigid side. I could see how you feel like you are in a pickle for something that, on paper, seems so simple.

Honestly, I'd not meet up with the aquaintance.  You don't need to. It's added stress.  Your DD is taking a school tour--she'll get all the info there.  She doesn't need to see the dining hall twice.   If she loves the school, she can call this aquaintance afterwards.

Think about what is happening here--you've engineered a playdate.  You *know* how easy it is to make a playdate for a child but how you cannot engineer one for teens as it will stress them out.  While the aquaintance is older and now practicing "adulting" which includes helping out younger kids, it's just a stressful situation for your DD.

So my vote is if your teen cannot handle dinner, then just drop this whole thing, or meet with the aquaintance briefly AFTER the tour (during the day, right before you are headed out of town)

(And consider coming clean with aquaintance why it didn't work out.  About a 1/2 hour ago, I explained to a mom-friend of mine why we were at her son's school but didn't tell her or contact her son.  But your situation is worse because you ARE asking the aquaintence to do something, and not giving back.  So just buck up and rectify it; it will be okay)[/quote]

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