Reply to “The Harsh Reality of Gentle Parenting”

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Reply to "“The Harsh Reality of Gentle Parenting”"

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[quote=Anonymous]I think the best way to view these concepts with respect to yourself is, "what sort of parenting style fits your personality and personal abilities" the most, and see if a small bit of the opposite approaches can help you.
For example, if you're a super-perfectionist with every minute scheduled, who is super-strict about rules, then relaxing everything by 10%, giving your kids a LITTLE less structure and letting yourself be a LITTLE less tightly wound might generate significant returns for their well-being and your relationship; it doesn't mean you should entirely turn into hippie-dippy crunchy parent and abandon your way.

On the other hand if you're really disorganized and chaotic and that's your style, but it causes problems, organizing somewhat - a more structured routine, a directed activity - can be good for your kids, but you also don't need to turn into tightly-wound tiger mom, because you won't be able to sustain it.

There are absolute excesses in permissive parenting, and unschooling and child-led traditions, and I see them a lot.
There are also excesses in the more mainstream parenting.

It can be reflected in sleep-training a very young baby who is clearly suffering by it and not knowing when to stop; waiting too late to potty train when "not ready" has ripened into "not interested"; disciplining a child who wants your attention or needs to run out their energy; etc. Not disciplining a child when they are inappropriate or disrespectful to yourself or others; enforcing routine to ridiculous levels, without any give; having no routine at all. All of these are not right, and they come up in every philosophy of parenting.

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