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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What job will you have where you can support teenagers, and pay of what I assume is a significant amount of student debt, and live in NYC? Or if not NYC, will your phD support a quality of life in flyover country?

It sounds like you have your life plan already going with quite a bit momentum and it’d be incredibly difficult to change direction at this point. You embarked on a path many years ago with desires and specific outcomes, where clearly a man was not considered at the beginning. You can’t just jam a man in at the end. The man you think you want is incredibly rare, like .00001% of the male population.

It’d be better for you to stick with being alone and figure out your life as you architechted it. You haven’t gotten your real job yet and you’re worrying about some imaginary traveling man to foster troubled 17 year olds with![/quote]

Thankfully I have no student loans to pay off. My PhD will be in biomedical science, and I receive a stipend for research, so I currently make a liveable wage. I plan to go into medical/science writing to combine my passion for writing (evidenced here, lol), as well as science. This career prospect will also have more opportunities for remote work and flexible hours - I prefer working early mornings like 5/6AM, but can also work late night hours too. It would be one of the more ideal careers to start a family solo for those reasons.

I do want to stay where I am now, in Brooklyn, because the need for foster parents is great here. Much as I’d love to live someplace closer to nature. My family’s here as well, so that’s another major reason for staying where I’m at for now. I’m not looking to lead a life of luxury - basic comforts and providing for my family will be more than enough for me.

I’ve always had a tendency to move full steam ahead towards what I’ve wanted in life, for better or for worse. I agree that stopping now, and trying to fit a guy into my ideal, would be difficult, if not impossible, especially since I’m not willing to compromise with fostering/adopting.

Gaining perspective from you and others in this thread has been helpful. And yes, I do sometimes dream about that ideal life, like anyone else who dreams about things. But I’m set in reality as is, and trying to gauge things.

Thanks again for your comment![/quote]

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