Reply to What is it about in laws that exhausts me?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm pretty surprised your inlaws help. My DH travels 3 weeks a month (M-F) and my inlaws expect us to go visit when he's home. It annoys me to no end because not only do they not help, but they demand the little free time he has.

But I agree that people visiting is stressful. You just can't be yourself around strangers.[/quote]

OP here - I'm very much an introvert, so I definitely struggle with needing time to do things that keep me sane - namely alone time and exercise, when they visit.[/quote]

Instead of being "on," give yourself full permission to be "off."

When my ILs visit, I say goodnight when the kids do, after bath and right before bedtime. Then I hide up in my room with pre-stocked snacks and Netflix.

On the weekends, I throw myself into folding laundry, yard work, errands, shopping, or anything that will either get me alone time or get me out of the house. If they say something, I smile and play my trump card: "You've been mentioning how much you want to see the kids, so I'm going to give you the kids and get some chores done!"

Now, I still make nice dinners for them, set up coffee for them, and go out if we all do something together like go to a museum. So it's not like I 100% ignore them. But I don't stay up late and "chat" with them; that's my husband's job, if he chooses to do it. I don't linger after breakfast when they want 3 more cups of coffee and to watch morning news shows--I'm off on a run, and then I've got that laundry to fold!

My feeling is, if they want to visit, let them visit. But that doesn't have to change my life that much. If anything, it gives me an excuse to tackle some of the bigger chores like changing out seasonal kid clothes, or reorganizing the pantry. [/quote]

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