Reply to In an affair, who "wins"? The wife or the mistress?

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Reply to "In an affair, who "wins"? The wife or the mistress?"

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[quote=Anonymous]For a long time it seemed the mistress won in my family. My ex wasn’t abusive or a bad guy, I loved our 16 years as a married couple, but he has adhd and is very impulsive, hence the affair. But he wasn’t “toxic” or hard to live with and he was/is a good dad so it wasn’t “easier” to parent without him. All the pluses I hear about divorce just didn’t apply to me. Our money and life was ripped in half and we all had to act polite for the kids. But as the years went on I think he became bored and his wondering eye came back. She became a little mentally unstable because I think her looks are very important to her and she correlated his moral failings with her getting old/losing her looks. I can tell they are on thin ice and it feels good to be out of the storm but I’m still pissed because now my kids will loose another parent figure that they like. But anyway on a whole she won, at least for the time being. I see her cooking in kitchen when I drop off my kids and and she’s all friendly and lightly frying the fish just as my ex liked and I think “dang you just up and stole my life.” But she didn’t steal it, my ex destroyed it. I know this rationally but it really doesn’t always feel that way. [/quote]

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