Reply to What’s fair—expectation vs reality when parents/ILs live far away?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] You’re joking but that’s exactly how we have hosted family many times. Not wanting to burn vacation days and thousands of dollars is fair. Banning grandma and grandpa from a living room air mattress is not.[/quote]

Nope, this would never work for me.  If we really don’t have space (and sun sit mattress in our family room is not the space), they can stay in a hotel.  It’s my house, of course it’s ok to decide who sleeps there.[/quote]

That's fine in a vacuum but it's part of a bigger negotiation about how often everyone will be traveling. If the goal is to travel infrequently (that's my goal) you only have so many negotiating chips. [/quote]
It’s an odd way to look at it. You are allowed to say no that doesn’t work for me. I would much rather have shorter quality visits than cramming a bunch of people into a too small place. The kids don’t sleep well, everyone ends up crabby and resentful. [/quote]

I can't imagine being crabby and resentful about having to be flexible about sleeping arrangements but I guess if you already know you and your family are easily made unpleasant by inconvenience you should act on that information. [b]My family is made of pleasant and easygoing people, including the kids, so I have a different perspective[/b]. [/quote]
Let me introduce you to my MIL. 
That is so fantastic for you, but my guess is OPs is not the same given the post. [/quote]

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