Reply to What’s fair—expectation vs reality when parents/ILs live far away?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My family is California and we are here.  Pre-Covid, we went out once a year, but they come here a few times a year.  It is easier for them to fly and visit us than for us to take the kids out there (time away from school/activities/work plus jet lag, harder to do long flight when kids were younger).  The one nice thing about San Diego, is there are a lot of things to do there and vacations you can take throughout California.  So I would plan trips when you have more time and combine it with family time- go up to LA or Santa Barbara, or out to Arizona for example.  Your kids are even a good age for a drive up the coast to San Francisco.  So you could go out for 10 days one summer and spend half with ILs and then drive up North and fly out from LA or San Fran.  Disneyland is also fun and much easier than Disneyworld.  Or leave the kids for a couple nights with the ILs and you and DH go for a night or two away.

As for Holidays, you will have to see how that works out.   You should pick the one time a year that works best for going to CA, and if it's Christmas fine, but if it's summer then you just need to tell them that and have them come to you for Christmas or alternate years.  You will see them less frequently, but when you do see them it will be a lot all at once. [/quote]

I am PP, just to be clear, I'm suggesting you go out once a year for at least a week.  I would not fly out more than once a year.[/quote]

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