Reply to I want a month break from spouse. How to approach?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Will this idea be a shock for the sah spouse?
Maybe he/she feels the same.
Why don't you talk about it instead of announcing it. 
He/she nay think some time apart is a good idea and my be the one who would like to get away.
Why do you get to make all the decisions?[/quote]

All of this, above.

OP, have you and your spouse had ANY actual discussions about your wanting time apart? Or do you keep all this to yourself, and you would be dropping a bomb on your spouse when you say, "I want to live at the other house for a month"?

Telling is not discussing. Announcing things is not discussing them.  suspect there is little to no calm communication in your household.

And a month is incredibly self-serving and frankly cushy. It's a VAST luxury to be able to have a month of perfect quiet in a house you have all to yourself. Do you see how that's ultimate luxury? Your spouse might like a month 100 percent "off" too. Most of all, as others have noted, you'd be taking a month away from your child. This will confuse even the smartest, most "independent" (your word, OP) child of nine.. I think you're ddeceiving yourself into believing your kid is iindependent so it's fine to go away for a month.

cIt's good to think through what you need to do for the future. It's good to do that thinking coolly and away from distractions.

It is unwise at best and immensely selfish at worst to put your serene contemplation in a private getaway ahead of your child and ahead of the tough work of real discussion with your spouse. eFace your spouse and talk. If you can't, involve at third party like a counselor to negotiate a split. There are counselors who do this. [/quote]

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