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Eldercare
Reply to "Letting go of making sure they die in the safest way"
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[quote=Anonymous]Thanks, OP. I needed to hear this too. My MIL has late stage dementia and is aggressive and mean. But my FIL, her full time caregiver, insists on keeping her at home as he thinks she would have wanted, even though he really can’t properly care for her himself. We check on them often, offer as much help as we can but we can’t force FIL to have MIL live in a dementia care unit. He refuses. The stress of it is destroying FIL’s health as well. It’s very hard watching their decline. But I think my husband and I have just accepted that this is how it will be and we do our best to help where we can even though they refuse most help. My SIL who lives abroad and hasn’t seen ILs in 2.5 years gives us a hard time about not helping them more and it makes us feel guilty due to our own worries and fears and regret about the situation even though we know that she’s in no position to judge us. I will look into the book recommended above. Thanks PPs who recommended it.[/quote]
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