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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, how old are your other children?

I know a teenager just like your son.  He does nothing his parents ask, but they never follow through.  Good for you for having consequences. [b] I wouldn’t turn the internet back on just because he finally shoveled.  He’d have to earn it back by not giving you a hard time.  [/b]

Hope your back feels better.[/quote]

No, no, no. This is the emotional, reactive way to go, and it puts DS in a no-win situation. Next time he behaves badly, his response will be, "well, there is nothing I can do now, she won't turn the internet back on, so why should I bother shoveling (or otherwise trying to make the situation better)?"

A kid who has behaved badly needs a path to make things right. Turning the internet off is a kind of shock to DS's system. He straightens up and tries to make things right. The appropriate reaction is to thank him for doing as he was asked, calmly remind him that you are all members of a family and cooperation is needed to make things go smoothly, and turn on the internet.

Never set up a no-win situation. It's your hurt feelings that make you want to say, "well, I got what I wanted but I'm going to keep punishing because I didn't get it the way I wanted it." Tempting, but entirely counterproductive. QTIP![/quote]l

This parent is wise. I will remember this![/quote]

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