Reply to Kids told me my parents spanked them

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Kids told me my parents spanked them"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Both you and your husband need to keep affirming that they can tell you anything and to come to you if someone tries to get them to keep secrets. If that did happen here, overtly or subtly, that is the most disturbing and harmful part. If so, it was grooming. I am not sure my kids would have connected the "not seeing them as much" that does sound like something more likely conveyed by the adults.

Steer clear of them, OP. [/quote]

+1000

It is deeply upsetting that your children kept something from you that they knew was wrong to protect their grandparents. This is precisely the kind of pattern that many of us are trying to stop as we raise this generation -- the idea that kids have to protect adults, that upsetting events should be repressed and not talked about to avoid conflict, etc.

This is why the people saying "it was just a swat, what's the big deal" don't have credibility here. I don't believe in spanking or hitting kids at all, but I would feel much differently about this situation if OP's parents had told her right after it happened and there had been a chance to discuss, address it with the kids, and have some kind of resolution. The secrecy is alarming.

Also, think about this child who held this secret in him for months and months and finally had to tell is mom even though he was worried about what it would mean. Just think about that for a second. His instincts are so pure and he just wants everyone to be okay. He shouldn't be carrying that kind of weight.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics