Reply to DC upset about grandparent favoritism

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to stop focusing on your mom and her behavior and keep your focus on your kid and how you and/or a therapist can help them process what’s happening. You can’t fix your mom. You can empathize with your kid (that means validating her feelings, not dissecting your mom’s behavior) and help equip her to deal with it. I think a few therapy sessions would be a great idea, to help your kid understand why she’s feeling so crappy and to have some strategies for how to manage those feelings. [/quote]

Something like, 
“I know you’ve been upset about grandmom praising Larla so much and not being as supportive of you. It’s really hard for me, because I know how awesome you are and what great work you are doing in activities A&B, and it makes me feel mad at my mom because I don’t want anyone to ever make you feel bad about yourself, and because you deserve to feel proud about your hard work and joy participating in activities A&B. Grandmom is not the decider of who is good and who is bad. 
It can be really hard to sort all of this out when it involves people who are close to us. Would you be willing to meet with a therapist a few times to talk about it? They may be better than me at helping you to process what is going on and figure out how to stay fair and kind to yourself.”[/quote]

Do not say anything like this. I had to read it three times. It’s awful. [/quote]

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