Reply to Anybody read tomorrow’s Carolyn Hax?

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[quote=Anonymous]Carolyn Hax's column makes sense to me.  I don't think it's based on the sex of the crazily defensive emotional abuser.  Although some of the column's advice might not be realistic for people who can't afford therapy, I think it's helpful to recognize subtle forms of abuse.  Maybe abuse is too strong a word, but the kind of reaction described is pretty bad.

Ironically, you could imagine the husband writing in to Carolyn Hax and receiving similar advice.  Another form of emotional abuse is constant nagging and expression of dissatisfaction.  It's hard to know exactly what was happening with that couple.  Maybe both of them were a little abusive?  It's definitely possible, but I'd guess the woman writing to Carolyn Hax is probably mostly right.

I'm male and I was pretty shocked when I was talking with a friend about the dynamics of my marriage--my wife was very defensive like the husband in the column but she also was very critical of my parenting skills and mocked me in front of the kids--and my friend told me that I was the victim of emotional abuse.  Before my friend used that word I thought we just disagreed a lot.  Recognizing the abuse eventually helped me muster the courage to leave (a few years later).  Almost nobody knew what was going on, but the kids eventually figured it out when they were in their late teens.  [/quote]

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