Reply to How do you deal with a spouse who doesn't stand up to his family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is there to be gained by confronting people that excluded you from events?
Other than looking like sad pathetic losers?[/quote]

These were small events just for family. On a few occasions my husband was the only one of the children not to be invited.
By confrontation I don't mean being rude or demanding. He could have casually asked if we could join them.

They sometimes organize these small events on a weekday. My husband works full time from Monday to Friday so he can't take time off work for family gatherings during the week.  It's usually a lunch at home or out, a celebration or other. The others are either SAHMs, or they have a more flexible timetable.[/quote]

Maybe your husband just doesn’t like these people enough to want to be included. You need to stop wanting to force this. I am not super close with my family. We are “fine” but not close. Every time my husband tries to force more closeness so we are like his family, it does nothing but piss me off.[/quote]

This is OP.
My husband is on friendly terms with his siblings but they're not super close. As I said earlier he doesn't go out of his way to form a stronger relationship with them. He likes them, but he thinks he doesn't have that much in common with them.

He is close to his mother though.

On a practical level they could organize these family gatherings at weekends, when we are all available and my husband and could join in. My husband doesn't want to take time off work during the week for lunches out with his mom and his siblings. They see each other more frequently than we see them.
When we do get together at larger family events his siblings and their spouses don't really talk to us much, apart from the usual social niceties. [/quote]

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