Reply to Husband Doesn’t Understand The Struggles

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I understand where your husband is coming from.  Do you truly have an infant?  As in four weeks old?  In that case, disregard.  I am more surprised you can work with the lack of sleep.

A typical baby sleeps at least 4-5 hours during the work day.  You’re saying you work PT.  Isn’t PT 4-5 hours?  You should have a 2 hour nap stretch in the morning and another 2-3 in the PM.  You say you’re interrupted by feeding.  Except for cluster feeding, which is very early on and typically early evenings, the child should be on more of a schedule and feed every 2-3 hours.  Again, enough time for you to work.

I had a baby and hired a nanny because I was supposed to.  Until my child was walking, it wasn’t really necessary.  There was a time window in the morning when I often had meetings and used the nanny.  Besides that, it was easy to have the child on a playmat, carrier or the child was sleeping.  It was kind of a waste and awkward having the nanny there with so little to do.  I remember I hired a cleaner for the first time and during maternity leave it was comical because the only thing I Did was go on a walk when my cleaner was at my house.  I could have easily cleaned with the baby but had been so scared precooked into ordering frozen dishes and having cleaners lined up.

There is a reason babies don’t do much - they haven’t developed and people couldn’t have additional kids if a baby was truly a FT job.  Unless you have a child with a developmental disorder or illness, it’s not that hard.  Get your kid on a schedule, naps aren’t optional and be religious about sleep.  Once you’re strict with a schedule, it’s pretty easy.  I mean a baby sleeps every afternoon!  I’d love my child to now take afternoon naps.

Or maybe you’re back at work at four weeks but I didn’t catch that from your post. [/quote]

It’s awesome that you had an easy baby, easy recovery and easy enough job to accomplish everything you listed. That’s not the experience everyone has. It’s also a little surprising to hear someone say that the supports they had and relied on are unnecessary and easy to do without. I’m sure it’s easy to have the baby in the room playing while you’re working, knowing you can have the nanny take the baby to a different area if they become distracting to you. That doesn’t mean your nanny wasn’t necessary or helpful. [/quote]

You had a very easy baby. Mine needed to be held for naps the first few months. You can’t breastfeed and nap a baby like that, and work the kind of intellectually demanding job I have. Our nannies had plenty to do.[/quote]

+1 …my nanny almost quit and she was a grandma. My kid had acid reflux and a dairy allergy. Reflux lasted a long time. She never slept and cried for 10 months straight. All day. Every day. Woke 3 times a night til age 3 then 2 times a night til age 6 years old. Earlier poster had an easy baby. [/quote]

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