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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP having been there, it will be ok whether you go to say goodbye or not. Don't go out of guilt or "It's your dad you HAVE to go" as some other posters have so rudely put it.

He's not there as you say (and I know). If the visit will traumatize you if won't do anyone any good. When we went through my child was older (12) but he was able to vocalize at a point that he no longer wanted to see my mother. He knew she was gone. I respected that. It's a little harder being younger and him asking, but he will be ok.

10 hours is a long way with no options for staying elsewhere. Whatever you decide, just know that it is ok and you aren't a horrible person. I feel like you need permission to do what's best for all of you.

[/quote]

I would not be able to live with myself not visiting my dad to say goodbye.

Stay in a hotel 2 hours away. I am sure there must be a hotel within 1 hour.

Op is just making excuses.

My dad has dementia too. Every time I see him, I feel depressed, sad and upset but I still go and see him.[/quote]

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