Reply to Child Had Dog Allergy & Husband Refuses To Give Dog Away

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I feel for you. I had similar issues a long time ago with a live in boyfriend who put his dog before people. We ultimately broke up over it. Fortunately I wasn't married. Getting rid of a husband is obviously not an option.

What is he primary motivation for keeping the dog? Is it because he loves the dog and selfishly doesn't want to part with it (understandable, I'm a dog person myself).

Is it because he thinks the dog wouldn't be well cared for by others? (understandable, too, possibly a control issue),

Or something else?  Because crating a dog for good portions of the day, especially when people are home, is no life for a dog. The dog would ultimately be happier in another good home.

However, you do have to be the advocate for your child. Your child can't care for herself in this situation.  This is near an ultimatum stage for me (I've got a son with multiple allergies, including to dogs). I'd first sit him down and explain that your child has to come first before the dog and their living together in a house is not working. Drugs dont seem to work, so your child has the double whammy of long-term drug use and misery.  His lifestyle modifications aren't working and aren't fair to the dog. I'd tell him it's reached the point that you both need to go to counseling. Personally, I'd tell him if we can't work it out, I will remove my child from the situation (move out). But I'd mean it. I wouldn't advise saying this unless you were going to follow through.

Men often tolerate periodic complaining knowing they don't have to change anything.   That sounds to me like what your husband is doing.[/quote]

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