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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'd love to parse this thread by age -- I bet all the people saying thank you notes are essential are over 35.

Under 30?

"It was my birthday/wedding/baby/haircut/Tuesday" so, of course you sent me a gift. I deserved it. I am special. And I am BUSY. I don't have time to say thank you. And besides, I didn't ASK for your gift. I just sent you an announcement/invite/lengthy registry and you CHOSE to give me something that I specifically asked for. So WHY should I thank you??? You are SO SELFISH!"[/quote]

You've got a gap there between 30 and 35, and this 31 year old believes very much in thank you notes. If I can't take a few moments to express my gratitude in a tangible, lastin way, then I'm not worth much. It's like being human to the kid in school no one likes - it isn't fun or easy, but neither is life.[/quote]

I'm 350 notes getter from the other thread. I am 39. I think thank you notes are nice. I think they are not compulsory. I believe that there is a time and a place for a handwritten note, and I'm pleased to get one. I have, on occasion, given gifts and wondered if they were received, because I didn't get a thank you. I've been on both sides. However, I certainly haven't put a black box next to their names. I gave them the benefit of the doubt - something in their life came up that made them too busy to write a thank you note. Interestingly, one of the couples I'm friends with, who got married and had a HUGE ceremony (500 people or so?) and sent a thank you note for a gift, was at our house the other weekend (gasp, yes, we still see them socially, even invite them to our home, despite their "transgressions" ha ha ha). The wife confided in me that she'd been feeling really crappy about not sending thank you notes. Her sister (lives in another country, I'd forgotten that she even had one) never showed up to the wedding, they had a fight, and then her sister was in an accident and passed away. She said she just had to put everything aside to cope for a while, and that it took a huge toll on her. Additionally, they'd just opened a business, and while she traveled, her new DH was doing all the work for the new place.  I was SO THANKFUL that I didn't have the bad manners myself to reprimand them on their lack of a thank you. Imagine how embarrassing it would have been for me to do so?

I think the people who think thank you notes are nice are all over the age groups. But something tells me the people think they must be sent at any and all cost are in the over 50, or even over 60 crowd. [/quote]

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