Reply to How to accept that we didn't have a second child

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You must not live in NYC! It’s mostly only kids here in Manhattan.

We have twins (IVF), and when people in our neighborhood hear that we have 2 kids they almost all put their hand to their mouth and say “Oh no! TWO kids!?” And then they suck their breath in through their teeth, shake their head, and tell us how that sounds so, so hard. One woman said how “sorry” she was that we had an “extra” kid to deal with! My husband and I now have an ongoing joke about which kid is the primary kid, and which one is the “extra”. But our neighbors  have a point - 2 kids is hard (and expensive).

Our kids are so so jealous of their friends, who are basically all only children. Their friends get all of their parent’s attention, go to amazing summer camps, and take international family trips (before covid). Their friends are such thriving, happy, mature, well-mannered and well-adjusted kids. Our kids are feral in comparison, and still can’t ride a bike. My college roommate is one of these NYC only kids, and she’s so happy with a beautiful family and an amazing career!

Finally, sibling rivalry is no joke - my kids don’t sit around being all loving towards one another - most of the time they are trying to claw each other’s eyes out (either literally or figuratively).[/quote]

This is only true of the poor families. Ppl with a lot of money (7 figure HHI at least) have multiple kids easily.[/quote]

Yes, we are “poor” for Manhattan - one doctor and one non-profit exec. Our kids go to public schools. But still, there are far more only children than kids with sibs in our neighborhood and social circle (mostly other doctors and their families) on the UES. And they are happy families with truly great kids!

I hear that rich people have lots of kids, but we don’t really interact with them - they have their own buildings, schools and social circles, and are not really relevant in our day to day life.[/quote]

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