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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Talk about burying the lede:

"Meanwhile, the stress of not being able to make ends meet turned who was once a wonderful man into a mean and cheating drunk. Yes he has cheated on me on top of everything else."

I mean, he's making money now so low earnings is no longer the issue.  Be glad you don't have kids because your DH is a cheating drunk.  GET OUT[/quote]

Op here. Citing work stress and frustration my husband went on a bender where he would get blackout drunk and not come home.

He finally got that under control, quit his job and started a business. It’s surprisingly doing well.

But I am now bitter and angry and hurt. [/quote]

And you will be bitter and angry and hurt if you divorce. And bitter and angry and hurt if you stay. Either way you cannot get back time you consider "lost."

The fact he got the drinking under control is good. The fact the business is doing well is good. The cheating must be dealt with, either with absolute and genuine contrition on his part or departure on yours.

You need to get past your own frustration. Note that I do not say "get over" it, but "get past" it. Either decide to work on the marriage (IF and only if he is no longer cheating and is truly contrite) or get out now before more time passes.

But one big red flag (besides cheating) remains: If he coped with stress at one point in his life by drinking and cheating, then how do you think he will cope when stress occurs next time? Unless he has willingly sought and accepted professional help, he is likely to turn right back to the crutches he used before, if his now successful business starts to slip.

So it's a crossroads for you and your marriage. Either double down on a lot of professional help if you want to stay, or suck up the lost time and get out. But please get help for yourself because you are eaten up with resentment and that does not help you in any way.[/quote]

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