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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a simliar situation--no sex for many years and not planned pregnancy (without cheating). He would not agree to an open marriage. We divorced. It's fine. I feel so much better than being married. [/quote]

I guess the hassle of divorce seems unnecessary right now.  We both want the house, we don’t like the idea of figuring out custody stuff or putting the kids through all the changes that go with it.  Plus, I don’t hate the guy.  Divorce seems so hostile.  I don’t mind continuing to live the way we do.  I’m happy with our lives and want him happy too.  If that means he sees someone else for fulfillment than so be it.

If he got serious with someone else that would be a different situation.  Obviously we’d have to reevaluate.  Things would probably have to change then…[/quote]

I really think it is fine to stay married in this situation. I am the poster who had a situation where I would be fine but he did not want an open marriage. Emotions for me in a divorce were nonexistent...exactly like the marriage. The logistics of housing has been the biggest PIA. Guess what? We are divorced and still roomates. COVID happened as it was final. Nothing has changed. My sense is whether you are married or divorced, not much will change. Most people do not understand these situations but I totally get it.

I would just do what you plan until it does not work anymore...thern reevaluate later. [/quote]

That’s my goal.  We’re both on the same page so other than others not understanding or judgment I don’t see why we can’t try.  I feel like this is preferable to immediately proceeding with divorce and having him move out.  Of course,
If that’s what he wants than that’s what he wants.  But for now, we seem to agree on how we want this to play out for now.[/quote]

I wish you the best. I get it. I would do it for as long as it works. People need to understand that not every marriage or family looks the same. [/quote]

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