Reply to What would you do if you found out your spouse of 25 years had a big secret

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ever wonder what else you don't know about him at this point? What else has been hidden? What else are you unaware of? He has been in the practice of telling lies and deceiving you for many years. [/quote]

After 25 years living together, how could you not know everything? 25. Years.[/quote]

Oh honey.  So naive.
 
It’s harder for those of us that always lived an authentic and transparent life and we’re raised in such a household to believe how good some are at deception or not showing a side they want people to see, even in decades long marriages.

My spouse even fooled very close family members and friends. Shock is an understatement.  The ground moved under my feet.[/quote]

OP, FWIW, I was also so naive. I had never experienced any friend or family member with alcoholism, so I simply didn’t know.  I didn’t figure out my DH was drinking until I noticed an empty in the trash and started marking the alcohol bottles and searching our room secretly when he was gone. I also looked at credit card receipts very carefully.  But, what sane person does that in a relationship?  There were other lies that finally prompted me to get to that point [/quote]

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