Reply to Constantly rejected and I'm feeling embarrassed. I'm not sure what to do

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you really sound like a fantastic catch, and so I think it may be your mindset that needs a little help.

I was like you and could suddenly feel really shy around guys and had trouble relaxing and engaging. I then thought about how I was so different with my friends and colleagues and decided, "Hey, I just met this guys so I don't really have anything invested. I just want to enjoy myself and have a good time." That helped me move from feeling shy/uncomfortable to just relaxing and being myself.

It also helped that I tried to make dating like a hobby- it was something I was going to do once a week, and I was going to get better at it. I became much better in having dynamic  conversations, perfecting my date outfits, and not taking it all so seriously.  I found the repetition helpful: you're kind of going to have at least several minutes of the exact same conversation on every date about who you are/what's your story, having a go-to casual and a fancier date outfit, makeup routine, etc. Practice may not make perfect, but it did make me less stressed and awkward.

I also had it confirmed by my friends and my now boyfriend that initial attraction matters. I also go for comfort over cute, but I made sure to always wear fitted clothes for every date. I love flowy dresses but that can be the kiss of death apparently with some guys. [/quote]

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