Reply to My dad asked me to call him nightly

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[quote=Anonymous]That is sad OP. Sad for your dad, and I also fully understand how that is a burden for you.

I think the ideas for regular check ins, especially w/ a video link, are great. And I also think it's good, right off the bat, to not necessarily commit to every single day. Line up other family and friends in that slot - just tell folks that evenings are hard for him and he'd really love to have folks check in. If you tell enough people that (and maybe you even coordinate a bit of a schedule for the first few weeks - like Jane calls on Mondays, Dick calls on Tuesday, etc...) then you can ensure he has the daily check ins he wants without you having to do all of that yourself.

Build in support for him without having to carry all of that yourself. That will serve all of you well in the long run.

Also, I did a daily phone call w/ Mom for more than 4 years. Often I wished I didn't have quite the absolute requirements of daily. Often I reminded myself that it wouldn't be forever and someday I'd know that I put that time in. My mom died last week. I couldn't do everything I might have wanted to in her last few weeks, but I logged more than a thousand calls with her in her last years. So there is comfort in that - which I say not to pressure you for the daily thing, but just to support you in knowing that whatever you are able to do will bring you comfort at some point in the future.

Best thing I've gotten from DCUM in recent months: "You don't have to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm."  It's VERY appropriate for these kinds of balancing acts in the sandwich generation crunch.[/quote]

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