Reply to Update to "Minimal amount of secret drinking"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I grew up with an alcoholic father. Although he never abused us he was a total drain on our home.

Leave for your and kids sake but also for his. He will either get better after getting the message or spiral into death. You can't keep doing this.[/quote]

OP here. I'm sorry you had to grow up like that. It's not fair.

He's told me a couple times now that he doesn't feel my support, that he needs more support, etc, but he hasn't taken any steps to actually find a program or treatment options. He's just going on willpower, which has failed over and over. I think he will look into some stuff now, but it's like nothing happens unless there's an incident that forces the issue. I am aware of the tendency for a drinker to attach blame to their partner who is standing in the way of unbridled drinking, and I feel that happening a bit. He said a couple things yesterday about how it's the restrictions that make it so hard and how he doesn't want to end up resenting me.[/quote]

None of this is your fault. He resents everybody and everything, or at least his disease does. The “restrictions” aren’t something you impose. Reality imposes them, one way or another.

He really needs AA or another group. [/quote]

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