Reply to Minimal amount of secret drinking

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wouldnt worry too much about this.  If she needed him he had had, what, one beer and one glass of wine?  Plenty of parents regularly drink more than that.  It doesn't seem to me that his drinking is a real issue - but he has some kind of paranoia/phobia of discussing it with you, which may be.[/quote]

awful advice[/quote]

Why?  I agree the communication is the issue, not the amount of alcohol.[/quote]

if there is nothing wrong, whats the big deal in discussing the issue and/or hiding it?

alcoholism and alcohol abuse isnt simply over drinking, or having a few weekends of being wasted. i get how people who consume alcohol normally view it through the lens of normal consumption and its nothing close to that.

im not diagnosing the extent of the spouses abuse. the behaviors they are showing arent that of a normal drinker.[/quote]
He could be a normal drinker with a wife who freaks out over 2 beers and he hides it because he wants to avoid the freak out. I agree there is no way to tell if it’s an alcohol problem or a different marriage problem from what is posted, and I also agree that OP and her DH may not be able to tell the difference. But don’t have another kid into this mess; figure it out first. Good luck.[/quote]

Read the OP. They were both having 3-5 drinks a day. The H has to avoid hard liquor because he can't control himself. A middle aged father shouldn't be getting blackout drunk or sneaking down to the basement to have a pint glass of wine. FFS.[/quote]

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