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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP I would assume they are seeing lots of things they can't afford to do "on vacation" or don't have the bandwidth to do them. Lack of money causes stress, and then you can't afford mental health treatment, so it snowballs over the years.

Going on "vacation" in a hotel with someone else paying, who you are beholden to for money, is a break, but not really a vacation. I mean, you sister and family are probably appreciate it, but you can't expect them to jump up and down with joy. [/quote]
This. Instead of paying for a hotel room, which they evidently weren’t enjoying, could you instead have forgiven the loan and let her do something she wants or needs with her tax refund? Why are you expecting her to enjoy something just because you would? Not everyone likes cities and being in a hotel room without money does not sound fun to me either. How many people are in the room? If it’s crowded, that explains the mess. You sound very kindhearted but a bit obtuse about her situation and perhaps you come off as judgmental to her.[/quote]

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