Reply to Advice needed regarding maintaining friendship with close friend with severely disabled child

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[quote=Anonymous]I can understand what kind of place your friend is in, OP.  I know that it's wrong but for a long time after my SN DC was born and I was just dealing with the day-to-day and also coming to terms with what the rest of our lives were going to be like because of the SN, I wasn't a good friend.  I was exhausted, overwhelmed, etc.  One of the things that held me back from interacting with others was that it really bothered me when they (even justifiably) complained about mundane things using words like "horrible" and "terrible".  Such as, "oh, I was stuck in traffic for 40 minutes without moving and it was horrible" or some such things when I had been witnessing my baby and then child have a horrific quality of life.  One of the only friends I actually could understand and relate to was someone whose DH was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  We didn't need to share out experiences too much but we could just "be" with each other.  People really don't know what to say to someone going through something awful (perhaps there is no good thing) but when someone you love is hooked up to tubes or suffering and it's not going to end well, you're really just not sympathetic to others' minor inconveniences.[/quote]

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