Reply to Single Guy Friend (33) Can't Find a Girlfriend

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Single Guy Friend (33) Can't Find a Girlfriend"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've seen a lot of the posts on here implying that men have the upper hand in dating, esp going into their 30s.

So, what to make of my guy friend who's never had a serious girlfriend? He is an Ivy grad, solid corporate career, reasonably good-looking. Dry sense of humor, supersmart, into culture, good talker and listener. Downsides? He is a bit pessimistic, and has some confidence issues, but nothing major. He is definitely a nerd, not athletic (but not overweight at all). No issues with abuse, prior baggage, family issues, cheating, alcohol, etc. He wants to marry and have kids.

He has tried to date mostly online (in NYC where he lives), and it has not worked out well. He says it's because he's Asian and looking for Asian girls, and they all want to date white guys. He is a bit picky with looks, but it boggles my mind when I read about how hard it is to find a good man (especially in your 30s), and here is this awesome guy striking out repeatedly. [b]Makes me wonder if women are complaining about the shortage of guys while overlooking perfectly good mates because they're not hot or flashy enough...[/b]

Or maybe both men and women overlook good potential mates while chasing some idea of a perfect unicorn relationship and then end up alone.[/quote]
You mean exactly like your friend is doing?[/quote]

+1. Pot, meet kettle.[/quote]
+1  one of the many things about incel men that I find idiotic is that there are plenty of women they could have sex with, but they are not the ones those incels *want* to have sex with.

It's not that he can't find a GF. It's that the women he wants as GFs don't want him as a BF. That's not the same thing.

I was single for a really long time. It's not that there weren't guys who didn't want to date me. It's that I didn't want to date the men who did want to date me, and the men that I wanted to date were unavailable or didn't want to date me.  If I just wanted to date,  I could do that with no problem.  But I was picky.

BTW, I'm Asian American, and my DH is white. There was no way I was going to marry an Asian American who had latent misogynistic tendencies.  [b]I have many Asian American male friends from my childhood, and most were born here.  Even so, they were raised by parents with old fashioned ideas of gender roles; my parents are the same way. [/b]  That does rub off on the born in the USA Asian men.    No thank you.[/quote]

examples please?[/quote]
? You need examples of traditional gender roles that are expected by Asian American MILs and their sons?

The examples are the same pretty much globally.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics