Reply to Mom Buying Too Many Clothes For My Kid...Am I Overreacting?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm curious how your mom would know if you give something away? Does she go through your kid's closets? Because that is extremely creepy.

My mom did this, and I would donate half the stuff before my kid even saw it. [/quote]

She hypes it up to my daughter ahead of time, like "Grandma's going to buy you this awesome thing! It's almost here! Grandma will bring it next time she comes over!" 
Then she absolutely wants to give it to her to see the reaction (or at least get a picture of us giving it to her), so donating before the kid sees it is not an option.

Afterward, she will just say things like "Oh, I haven't seen Larla wear that unicorn sweatshirt in a while, you haven't donated it have you?"

And she does look at her closet sometimes. When she comes over to play with my daughter, say they play at home for a bit and then are going to the playground. So then she takes her to change into an outfit that's more appropriate for the playground, and then they're going through the dresser and closet and she will see what's not there and what is. [/quote]

Oh my lord this is so manipulative!

I would be firm.  "That's great mom, but we don't have room for more.  Larla and I are going to find some things to donate to make room." Then HANG UP THE PHONE.  Using your child's emotions to try to manipulate you into keeping more stuff than you can manage is NOT ok.  I'd even consider limiting contact if she escalates.  My MIL has recently started to demand pictures of the kids doing crafts she leaves.  My kids don't like crafts!  I tell my DH he has a month to do them, and then I'm giving away the craft stuff.  But what I won't do is hold onto forever out of some ridiculous guilt.  If she thinks I'm ungrateful she can do two things: come over and do the crafts with them herself OR stop buying stuff (I want this, clearly).

I'd also find a Facebook mom's group or Buy Nothing group and just regularly post stuff to clean it out.  I'd stop having any guilt about it, but I would not allow her to make my child to feel guilty about it.  That is not ok at all.[/quote]

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