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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi OP, we share a similar struggle, although I had some happy years as a younger child despite experiencing trauma, by my mid teens depression had hit and it just got worse over time. I’m 50 now.

I’ve definitely been saved from some very deep troughs by SSRIs, but I don’t currently take one as the side effects outweigh the benefits over time. Research seems to bear this out - talk therapy, exercise and mindfulness are as beneficial if not more than medication except in crisis.

If you’ve done medication and it hasn’t helped, I highly recommend looking into ketamine therapy in your area.

I also recommend DBT, which was originally developed for therapy resistant borderline personality disorder and has since proven to be very beneficial to treatment resistant depression/anxiety. There’s a great new book out written by two psychiatrists/psychologists at McClean Hospital, a premier psychiatric facility in Boston - it’s called DBT for Dummies. Don’t be put off by the title. Mindfulness is an incredible tool for managing emotional dysregulation and the suffering of human existence - hence the Buddhists.

I also really encourage you to establish a regular walking program, preferably in a park with lots of leafy green nature. Humans aren’t built to live in boxes until artificial lights, but most of us do most of the time. In some countries ‘forest bathing’ is actually prescribed by physicians, research shows such a highly beneficial effect. Sitting in nature is good too, but my own experience participating in a research study at Brown University’s Butler Psychiatric Hospital in 2019 really proved to me how enormously beneficial physical exercise is to boosting mood and quelling anxiety - with the positive side effect of facilitating good sleep.

It’s not fair that we were born with these brains, but it is what it is. I honestly don’t think most folks are happy all the time anyway - I think most people are managing some kind of pain. As Hemingway said, life breaks everyone - and some are strong at the broken places. Keep soldiering on, and cherish the moments of mental calm and joy when you find them.

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I think this was a great response.

To OP: I hear you and wish you comfort.[/quote]

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