Reply to Daughter dating 31 year old man

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A little different, but my 31 year old son is engaged to a 23 year old.  She was 19 when they started dating.  Freshman in college. She is more mature than he is in many ways. Her parents were initially really concerned.  They adore him now. [/quote]
I'd be more concerned about their long term marriage if your 31 yr old is immature and engaged.[/quote]

I didn’t say he was immature.  He is college professor and Captain in the National Guard.  He is a combat vet X3.  Very smart.  Very successful.  But definitely ADHD.  She has the maturity of someone well over her age.  Sometimes age really is just a number. [/quote]

Respectfully, I’d be more concerned that she will outgrow him as she enters her mid-20s....and she should, tbh. Her parents are right to be concerned because the gap at that stage of life is too great. She will mature and change and the things that attracted her young heart to him at 19 and now at 23 will not find them so endearing in her late 20s and 30s. It doesn’t matter that her parents adore him (he’s probably great!—I’m not doubting that!) But please try not to blame her when she grows into a woman and no longer has the same thoughts and desires and attraction of her child self.
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