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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Have you talked with the pediatrician about these issues? Our ped always made us feel that we could ask her anything...and we did. [/quote]

OP here. Yes. The pediatrician recommended we sleep train. My wife has refused to do it. [/quote]

Sadly attachment parenting circles have some cultish aspects. I’m sorry she has gotten so deep into it. You probably need to give it some tries with very empathic listening so she feels heard: “You really are worried that this could harm his brain forever. You are trying so hard to be a good mother. You work so hard to give him everything he needs. You care so much about his health and development.”

But also affirm her other feelings “this is exhausting you. You don’t know how you can go on with so little sleep. Your back really hurts.” Some I messages “I’m worried that your back will only hurt more as he gets bigger. I’m concerned that he might need a little bit of practice to develop self-soothing skills which will give him more confidence in life.” Or whatever your feelings are.

Collaborative problem solving: so you want this, and I’m worried about this. What can we do? See if that gets you to a compromise on the gentle methods. She might agree to be in the room and pat him when he cries until he falls asleep.[/quote]

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