Reply to attempted suicide of acquaintance- reach out to parent?

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "attempted suicide of acquaintance- reach out to parent?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m one of the posters who said uptbtead that I personally would not have been happy to get a note from someone I didn’t really know.  I respect that other people have different perspectives and acknowledge I may be more private than most.

I am a little surprised that none of the people who work in suicide prevention noted that there is a potentially problematic dynamic when kids who were never friends with the child before are suddenly reaching out and supportive due to the suicide attempt.  For a child who is depressed and socially isolated, if the depression and suicide attempt becomes the means to become “special” or to get positive attention, it can be really problematic.  I think it’s especially true where there’s a personality disorder at play and not just depression.  I’m not saying that kids shouldn’t support each other, but there’s a sort of complicated line here.  Suicide is different from other health conditions in this way.  I’m not the most educated on this but my child did DBT to recover post-attempt and I think one of the tenets of DBT is that kids should not really be discussing this stuff with peers outside of the mediated DBT program.  I think if my kid knew of another kid who had attempted suicide, I would encourage them to be extra kind to the kid, reach out to suggest a movie night or a hike or dog walk or whatever, [b]but not have my kid specifically talking about the attempt with the child, or making it seem like the friendly overture is motivated by the attempt.  [/b][/quote]

The dynamic you're describing is incredibly nuanced and challenging even for many mental health professionals to manage, let alone teens/tweens and their (non mental health expert) parents.  Keep in mind that most kids/parents aren't going to do the bolded because most of them don't have personality disorders themselves and, moreover, those are incredibly uncomfortable topics to discuss for most people.

So, I get what you're saying, but I think the slim chance of that happening shouldn't get in the way of the OP sending a short message of support and her daughter doing the same.  The separate process is the child and family getting the treatment they need--but that doesn't mean they don't also need compassionate support from their community, even at somewhat of a distance.

I hope your child is doing better.  DBT is a solid program, and it's changed a lot of lives for the better.  All the best to you.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics