Reply to Expecting a different life at this age, so help with a reset:

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]But what did you and your DH do before you had kids? What's wrong with traveling? I traveled a lot with dh and my parents before kids. This is your time to see places- Hawaiii,machu picchu or whatever you've always wanted before old age.

What about your careers? Are you retired?

I'm sorry about the lack of grandchildren. I will say that it factored into us having a 3rd baby. We're hoping one of the three will want to have kids. We only have one sibling each and they didn't have children. Our parents basically fight over every holiday for grandkids. [/quote]

Good idea. We often wish we had more kids.

But again, we are pretty active. Not needing things to do.  [/quote]

I get it.   I'm not at that stage yet, but would feel the same as you.   You things to fill your time....but not your heart.   I get it.

I feel like it's an outgrowth of our culture.  True family connection (not splitting off and making other tiny families, but remaining a multigenerational connected family) has become secondary to education/jobs/careers/money/"independence".   This is our culture and I am trying hard to teach my children a different value system.  Just keep track of how many people on this board alone are starting to recognize that being close to extended family is something they wish they had.    It's sad but has to change on a personal level before society will accept a change.
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I think  you get it. Thanks. That's it. [/quote]
I think this PP gets it, but wow, to try and go against the culture of independence is going to be a real fight.  I say this because of a more general concept or belief I have, which is that it's much easier to be in an environment that will help you attain what you want, that one that is going against what you want (e.g. "it takes a village").
I recall talking with someone years ago who wanted something like this, and was going to move to Spain to try to attain it.

I agree with a PP to mourn, and then construct as best you can something that is similar.  (like moving to be near a cousin's family, etc.  I'll have to look up your OP again, to see if that is a possibility).  I think it is possible to be a "special friend" (as in "Grandparents and Special Friends Day" at schools).  For years, my friend Larla, whose mom lived across the country and was not that enthusiastic about her children, had a neighbor who was like a surrogate grandma.  [/quote]

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