Reply to attempted suicide of acquaintance- reach out to parent?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was in this place and if you were not a close friend I would not have been happy to have you in our family’s business. People can say it’s just like any other illness but the truth is it’s not.  We did not spread this news around and I would have been really upset that people I didn’t know well were chatting about it.  I only told some friends at the office, in part because I took FMLA leave.[/quote]

I’m sorry that you have experienced this, but the stigma that you are perpetuating put your loved one even more at risk. It is OK to except help from others when you have a person who has symptoms of an illness that can be deadly. Hiding And shame only makes it worse for everyone who suffers, and it cuts you off from support and help that could potentially be there for you as well.[/quote]

Eh—she’s free to tell whoever she wants, and I’ve actually encouraged her to share what she learned in the process with younger girls through various community service projects.   But I’m not going to be spreading around information about her medical condition.  And I’d be pissed at peoole in the neighborhood for taking about it.  She went through a year of DBT after hospitalization and is doing well.   But an important part of her recovery was having and developing an identity and a vision for herself outside of “depressed girl.”  
Frankly, if I had cancer I wouldn’t want a bunch of random people in the neighborhood talking about it either.  If I didn’t tell you, the. I probably don’t want you to know.  [/quote]

Please listen to this.  You weren't friends before, you didn't care before, so why do the fake caring now.  This family needs real friends.  You may have good intentions but usually when people do this kind of thing its more about their needs than the recipient.    This is why you try your best to be nice to all parents and not just your close group and teach your kid to be friends with everyone vs. being exclusive.[/quote]

Wow, not OP or the PP you're replying to, but you are being jumping to a really unhelpful and so far, uncalled for conclusion. Why assume OP is being fake? "This family needs real friends, don't do fake caring now", well if the family HAS real friends, hopefully they've reached out, but suicide or suicide attempts are often something that even "real friends" don't know how to deal with and often people's instincts is to be silent, to NOT reach out.

I refuse to believe and have rarely encountered situations where heartfelt, sincere expressions of "Thinking of you" or offers of concrete help or just simple "I don't know what to say but want you to know I'm so sorry this happened" can mean THE WORLD.  THE WORLD! to a family that is feeling completely isolated and maybe even shunned by the silence and awkwardness of so many.

So sure, give the advice you think is best, but maybe don't jump to wild conclusions about OP's intentions or the family's needs when there is NOTHING in the posts to suggest OP is being fake or the family is like you and doesn't want even aquaintances to check in.[/quote]

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