Reply to Why does everyone say their third was an accident?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I don't really understand how married people every have "accidents". Like once you're married, and especially once you've had a kid or two, you obviously know what the deal is. I know some people will say "Oh we thought I couldn't conceive" but as someone who is very clear about not wanting more children, this is not a risk I would ever, ever take.[/b]

I think sometimes people are defensive about having 3+ kids because it's increasingly uncommon. So I think they say "oh, Larlo was an accident!" so it sounds like it just happened and it can deflect from uncomfortable questions.

But saying you had a third kid "by accident" makes me [silently] judge you more. If you want a big family, own it. As long as you love and care for your kids, why would matter to me? But acting like any of your kids are a burden or that your family is anything other than intentional makes me wonder if you treat your kids that way, too. I had parents who treated me like an accident they semi regretted and it sucked. [/quote]

I completely agree with this.  Either you're preventing pregnancy or you're not.  Especially once you're in your 40s with kids.  It bugs me.[/quote]

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