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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Any chance someone in her neighborhood has cozied up to her during the pandemic and is helping her out a great deal and giving company and check ins.  Even precovid we had someone do this with a great uncle. They turned him against his family.  The got him to write all family out of his will and leave everything to them. Family care little about being cut out of the will, but miss him and would like to reconnect before he passes. [/quote]

This.

I know of situation where this was happening.  Woman cozied up to rich lonely old lady and then milked the lady for all she was worth.  Not sure how long it went on, as I didn't approve and distanced myself once I learned this is how woman was funding her son's private school education.  Anyway, there are people out there who take advantage of the elderly.[/quote]

Yes, watch out.  This happened in our family, too.  Hopefully it's not the case in OP's grandmother's case.

[b]Great-uncle was a CPA, but in his last few years (in his 90s), he felt that he could no longer handle his own finances so he hired a bookkeeper.[/b]  His second wife passed first, but he left two children from his first marriage and three widowed/single sisters.  The bookkeeper ingratiated herself with a few family members (e.g., his niece/my mother's sister who was a sucker who fell for scam after scam) while he was still alive.  The bookkeeper didn't fully isolate him from family, but she was suddenly involved in everything he did (e.g., if my grandmother talked to him by phone, she was always there even though he lived in assisted living and didn't need help besides his finances).  I suspect that she had POA.

[b]After he passed, it turned out that he left everything to the bookkeeper in a new will. [/b] We weren't expecting anything and felt bad for his children but kind of understood why he may not have left anything to his children or grandchildren (one child was almost definitely illegitimate and the other likely was also, but this was never publicly acknowledged and it wasn't their fault), but [b]one sister who he was very close to and who really could have used a token amount was devastated because he had always helped her out and he had previously promised or implied that he would continue to take care of her after he passed[/b].

[b]This happened again when my grandmother left half her estate to each daughter, then my mother's sister unexpectedly passed shortly after her, and then my aunt's elderly husband died shortly after that. [/b] The money my grandmother left my aunt was supposed to pass back to my mother after they passed -- if any remained -- because they didn't have kids.  Instead, after my aunt passed, mom's BIL ran though most of the money that was in the trust and racked up huge debts, but kept a large amount of money (enough for 20+ years of retirement) in my aunt's IRA and converted it into his IRA first.  [b]Who was the beneficiary of the IRA (which could not be touched for any of the debts)?  His accountant.  In his last few months, unbeknownst to us, my uncle couldn't pay his bills but the IRA remained untouched.  My mother was stuck trying to pay off his estate's debts using what very little money remained in the trust and my aunt and uncle's estates, while the accountant got a significant windfall Scot-free.[/b]

[b]I also understand the sting of being promised something and then having it taken away; it's much worse than if it had never been promised. [/b] One grandmother (same as above) didn't leave me anything and I didn't expect anything, but the other made a big production of leaving me a token amount of money (enough to buy an economy car) in her new will.  When she passed, that will could suspiciously not be located -- and no one (father, aunt, cousins) seemed to recall it ever existing -- and I wasn't left anything.  It would have been fine had she never said anything about it -- I wouldn't have expected anything -- but it's really painful and unkind to promise/create an expectation and then break the promise/not follow through.

At least in my case, I choose to believe that my grandmother really meant to leave me the money.  Were I in OP's shoes's, I probably wouldn't break off contact or allow it to change my relationship with her much, but I would be hurt and suspicious.[/quote]

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